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Make friends with your inner voice
Most people have an inner voice.What you say to yourself, and how you say it, makes a difference to how you think, feel and behave, so it's worth paying attention to it.
What is your inner voice?
Your inner voice is always with you, giving a commentary inside your head. You might notice it when you make a mistake, when you try something new, or when you solve a problem.Sometimes it sounds kind but at other times it can sound mean or scared. Young people's coach Maria Evans says it should be treated with kindness. "It gets scared when you think about doing something that feels stretchy." Often all it needs is to be listened to and spoken to with love.
How does your inner voice affect you?
Your inner voice, also known as your self-talk, has an impact on you because you already pay attention to it.If you keep telling yourself you can't do maths or you're no good at making friends or you're not creative, over time you'll believe what your inner voice is saying. When you talk to yourself using a phrase like "I've got to tidy my room," it makes the task feel harder. If instead you say, "I choose to tidy my room, and then I'll be able to find the things I want easily", it's more positive.
Befriend your inner voice.
For example, when you do something you felt nervous about, congratulate yourself for being brave and having a go. If you're not sure what to say, imagine you're talking to your best friend and trying to support and help them inside your head.
A. Your inner voice has different tones.
B. It's the internal chatter that goes on inside your head.
C. So what you say to yourself, and what you hear, sinks in.
D. You're telling yourself how you'll benefit from tidying your room.
E. It can be helpful to talk to that voice with kindness and understanding.
F. When you make a mistake, tell yourself it's OK and you'll learn for next time.
G. Noticing your inner voice and talking encouragingly to yourself make you more confident.