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I wanted everyone's praise and acceptance, but I was my own toughest critic. After I graduated from high school and moved out on my own, I began to put pressure on myself to succeed in the adult world. Meanwhile, I was feeling very inadequate and unsuccessful.

I had always been a thin-to-average sized person. But suddenly, I was convinced that I was overweight. In my mind, I was FAT! I began to control my food by trying to diet, but nothing seemed to work. I slowly cut back on what I ate each day. With every portion I didn't finish or meal I skipped, I told myself that I was succeeding, and in turn, I felt good about myself—attractive, strong, successful, almost super-human. I could do something others couldn't: I could go without food. It made me feel special, and that I was better than everyone else.

People around me began to notice my weight loss. At first they weren't alarmed; maybe some were even envious. But then the comments held a tone of concern. "You're losing too much weight." "Elisa, you're so thin." "You look sick." "You'll die if you keep this up." All their words only pleased me that I was on the right path, getting closer to "perfection".

I cut back on my food more and more, until a typical day consisted of half a teaspoon of nonfat yogurt and coffee in the morning, and a cup of grapes at night. It even got to the point where I no longer went out with my friends. I couldn't—if I went to dinner, what would I eat? I avoided their phone calls. If they wanted to go to the movies or just hang out at home, I couldn't be there—what if food was around?

My poor nutrition began to cause me to lose sleep. I found it hard to concentrate on my work or to focus on anything for any length of time. I was pushing myself harder and harder at the gym, struggling to burn the calories that I hadn't even eaten. My friends tried to help me but I denied that I had a problem.

注意：

1）续写词数应为150左右；

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