My hands were shaking uncontrollably. I tried incredibly hard to focus on the words that I spent hours putting down on paper. I tried to conquer my fear of speaking in public on numerous occasions throughout my life. During college and at my first few jobs, I would get ridiculously nervous when I had to give a presentation or lead a meeting. Public speaking had been my nemesis for as long as I could remember.

Then in my mid-thirties, I decided to join the public speaking group Toastmasters. At every meeting, we were rated and forced to compete with other speakers for an award. You would think that I would walk away from these experiences as a polished speaker, but nothing seemed to work.

It wasn't until recently, when science and scientific institutions were being attacked for unfair reasons during the pandemic, that I decided I must speak out. Science has made this country a place where dreams come true — this is why we all need to protect science. In addition, as a science writer, I try to get readers to understand how science is related to their daily lives.

So I ended up on that frightening stage on that sunny Saturday in April — Earth Day. Despite the body shakes and fear, I persevered. That day, I looked out into the crowd of like-minded science supporters and I felt comfort.

Reaching that milestone goal of getting through a speech truly changed me. At almost forty, I learned that passion can set off a flame in my heart to do things I never dreamed possible. The darkness that led to my speech is sure to lead to new opportunities and adventures.