During the winter break, I found my dad's old CD player in a drawer that I had never seen before. It reminded me of the three CDs I recently bought from Mostly Books, a second - hand media store on South Street. I knew I could put the player to good use with them.

However, I was a naughty kid who broke closet doors and shelves, so my dad was often unwilling to let me borrow his things. I couldn't decide whether to ask my dad about using the player. "Can you help me with your old CD player? I want to play some CDs , "I finally asked him after walking into his home office that day. Despite my worries, my dad said yes.

Growing up, I felt that my dad disagreed with nearly everything I did. I was frightened to take his advice because listening to him felt like going against my own ideas.

That day I looked at his office wall and saw a painting and he told me he bought it in the 1990s for a couple thousand dollars. Imagining him buying the artwork challenged my idea of him being too frugal (节俭的) and boring (没有情调的) to spend so much money on art.

This new side of my dad encouraged me to finally take the time to look for our similarities. I discovered how similar we really are while fixing the CD player with my dad, which helped me see him as someone I could relate to, instead of someone to avoid. Watching my dad prepare his old CD player for use was my first step toward understanding him. I observed several of his characters that I recognized in myself, like persistence, patience and calmness. Seeing these characters in my dad showed me how similar we are , which lowered the defenses (防御) I built against him, allowing our relationship to heal (愈合).