I am a strong believer that if a child is raised with approval (认可) he learns to love himself and will be successful in his own way.
Several weeks ago, I was doing homework with my son in the third grade and he kept standing up from his chair. I kept asking him to sit down, telling him that he would concentrate (集中注意力) better. He sat but seconds later, as if he didn't even notice he was doing it, he got up again. I was getting angry, but then it hit me: I started noticing his answers were much quicker and right when he stood up. Could he concentrate better while standing up?
This made me start questioning myself and what I had been raised to believe. I grew up to believe that a quiet child was more likely to succeed. This child would have the ability to study hard, get good grades and become someone important in life. Kids that were active and loud would only be losers.
Now people perhaps come to realize that their kids are born with their own sets of DNA, and all they can do is loving and accepting them. As parents, throughout their growing years and beyond that, we need to guide them and help them find their way.
I have stopped asking my son to sit down and concentrate. Clearly, he is concentrating, just in his own way and not mine. We need to accept our kids, and their ways of doing things. There is nothing sweeter than seeing our children being themselves. It makes us happy and that's just the way I want my kids to live a happy life.
