When your child lies to you, it hurts. As parents, it makes us angry and we take it personally. We feel like we can never trust our child again. Why does lying cause such anger, pain and worry for parents?

    Parents are understandably very afraid of their children getting hurt and getting into trouble, but they have very little protection against these things as they send their kids out into the word. Kids learn from other kids and from external media, and this makes parents feel unsafe becausetheycan't control the information and ideas that their children are exposed to.

    When your kid lies, you start to see him as “sneaky（卑鄙的）”, especially if he continues to lie to you. You feel that he's going behind your back. You begin to think that your kids are “bad”. Because, certainly, if lying is bad, liars are bad. It's just that simple. Parents need to make their kids responsible for lying. But the mistake parents make is that they start to blame the kid for lying. It's considered immoral to lie. But when you look at your kid like he's a sneak, it's a slippery slope （滑坡谬误）that starts with “You lie” and ends up at “You're a bad person”.

    Kids know lying is forbidden. But they don't see it as hurtful. So a kid will say, “I know it's wrong that l eat a sugar snack when I'm not supposed to. But who does it hurt?” “I know it's wrong that I trade my dried fruit for a Twinkie. But it doesn't really hurt anybody. I can handle it. What's the big deal?” That's what the kid sees.

    So I think that parents have to assume that kids are going to tell them lies, because they're immature and they don't understand how hurtful these things are. They're all drawn to excitement, and they'll all have a tendency to distort（歪曲）the truth because they're kids.